On December 1st, at approximately 1:15 am, an Apple Smart Watch initiated a call to Yavapai County Sheriff’s Office 911 alerting them to a crash that occurred at the Arizona Department of Transportation (ADOT) yard in Cordes Lakes. The man attached to the watch summarily disputed the claim of an accident, saying that everything was fine and that his Apple Watch should just mind its own business.
The 911 Dispatcher, accustomed to family arguments and not one to take sides, decided to send a deputy to the scene just to get the facts straight and make sure the presumed argument between man and timepiece was not getting out of hand, er… wrist.
When the deputy arrived, he confirmed that an accident had indeed occurred, finding an ADOT plow truck was on its side in the driveway area, sporting a large amount of damage. At this point the deputy, who was less inclined to remain neutral in the dispute having seen evidence that “Ms. Apple” was telling the truth, tried to locate the man who had been driving the truck. He was told by ADOT employees on scene that the hen-pecked (watch-pecked?) man had left in a personal vehicle shortly after being assisted out of the cab of the truck.
Attempts to locate the driver were unsuccessful, having found that the address on his personal vehicle registration in Dewey was false and didn’t exist. Attempts to call the man were also unsuccessful, presumably because he had told his nosy Apple Watch that snitches get stiches – or their batteries removed.
Four days later, YCSO deputies did locate the man who allegedly admitted to driving the plow truck at a speed too fast for the turn where the vehicle overturned. His reason for speeding and leaving the scene? – he was in hurry to get to his Elk hunt. Ms. Apple stated when interviewed, “I told him that the Elk could wait, but did he listen?? No…”
The elk-seeking, accident-denying, technology-betrayed man was charged with Criminal Damage, False Reporting to Law Enforcement and Failure to Stop for an Accident involving damage.
“Everyone is sooo worried about what I do”, said Amazon Alexa. “I only listen, At least I don’t tattle”.
