Prescott eNews                     Prescott Valley eNews                                Chino Valley eNews

November 14, 2024 7:29 am
Search
☼ Prescott eNews ☼
PRESCOTT WEATHER
PRESCOTT VALLEY WEATHER

2022’s Best and Worst Cities for Vampires – Lawn Love

Image by Three-shots from Pixabay

[Editor’s note: A tongue-in-cheek piece for Halloween.]

Do you feel most alive at night, detest garlic, and have a habit of lurking in the shadows?

Whether you wear a cape daily or just once a year for Halloween, you can fang Lawn Love for ranking 2022’s Best Cities for Vampires.

We looked for cities with plenty of warm bodies, blood centers, and vampire-friendly dwellings — aka casket suppliers and homes with basements. We also considered deterrents like garlic festivals and sunshine, as well as community and entertainment factors, such as vampire groups, nightlife options, and vampire tours.

Slake your thirst for blood knowledge and plan your next blood donation with our city rankings and analysis below.

Northern Nosferatus vs. Southern Slayers

Sunless Northern cities crept to the top, with New York leading the way as our vampire empire.

NYC is the ideal city for vampires, thanks to having the most potential victims. It also has the most slaughterhouses and vampire groups out of all the cities in our ranking. It doesn’t hurt that the MTA runs 24/7, and eccentric styles are so common that vampires can easily blend right in.

Big cities like New York, Chicago (No. 2), and Seattle (No. 13) have plenty of fresh blood, nightlife options, and casket suppliers.

It’s no surprise that Surprise, Arizona, came in dead last and other sunny Southern cities fell in our ranking, with other Arizona cities plus Nevada and California taking up the bottom 10. While fewer layers of clothing might make it easier to sneak a drink through all four seasons, it’s hard to avoid the sun’s rays with maximum sunshine, minimal cloud cover, few homes with basements, and scarce casket suppliers (especially in California).

Transylvania, USA

Is Pennsylvania the Transylvania of America? Maybe so — both of the biggest Keystone State cities made their way into our top 10.

Philadelphia brings home the bronze with a high number of vampire groups and tours (No. 2 in both). Philly also has a high population, abundant nightlife options, and numerous blood drives to keep vampires well fed and entertained. Pittsburgh isn’t too far behind at No. 6, with plenty of blood centers, casket suppliers, and basements to appease sunless lifestyles.

German immigrants may have brought vampire lore and panic to the colony, leading to numerous superstitious vampiric exhumations up until 1949. The Erie Cemetery is even rumored to house a cursed vampire crypt.

Shadowy histories

Despite lacking in Food and Drink and Lair Safety, New Orleans (No. 15) continues to grow its vampirical legacy. NOLA has the most vampire tours due to local icons like legendary author Anne Rice and infamous vampire Jacques St. Germain. Louisiana and California are both hot spots for vampire film set locations, such as for “True Blood,” “Interview With The Vampire,” and “The Originals.”

San Francisco (No. 5) follows closely behind in tours (No. 2), thanks to the historically scary Nob Hill neighborhood. The Golden City also has plenty of blood centers, vampire groups, and nightlife options to balance out the sunshine and herb shops. Beware The Stinking Rose, a restaurant that proudly claims the mantra “We season our garlic with food.”

Sunny Los Angeles (No. 4) impresses with the highest number of vampire-friendly nightclubs, in addition to the second highest population and numerous slaughterhouses, casket suppliers, and vampire groups.

  • San Francisco: Take a vampire tour through Nob Hill to explore historic and haunted sites including the Grace Cathedral, Huntington Park, and Fairmont Hotel.
  • New Orleans: NOLA boasts streets of Victorian architecture, the annual Anne Rice Vampire Ball, and Boutique du Vampyre. You might even see some creatures of the night lurking around the French Quarter after sundown — maybe Jacques St. Germain?
Like To Write? Contact editor@enewsaz.com
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
Pinterest

Related Articles

Scroll to Top